The Achilles Heal that Stops Me From Following My Instinct

INTRO: After generating over a million dollars in sales and selling one of her businesses with a single email, your host, Kathryn Thompson, takes an unconventional approach to marketing and sales. So if you're ready to tap into a more powerful way to be seen, heard, and a sought after entrepreneur in your industry, without having to spend endless hours marketing your business and chasing clients, you're in the right place.

Be The Sought After Entrepreneur Podcast is here to help you ditch the cookie cutter, one size fits all approach to marketing and use your unique energy to effortlessly attract the most aligned clients. When you do this, you can spend less time marketing your business and more time doing your soul work and enjoying the richness of your life.

Welcome to Be The Sought After Entrepreneur Podcast. And here's your host, Kathryn Thompson.

Kathryn Thompson: Hey, hey, super stoked that you're tuning in this week's episode. I cannot wait to dive in [00:01:00] today's topic because I know that what I'm about to share with you is going to resonate with a lot of you, especially if you're a changemaker, a thought leader, somebody who is really driven by impact over income, somebody that wants to leave the industry that they're in or the world that they're in.

in a better place or state than when they arrived and who really want to be innovators in the work that they're doing. They want to do things differently. They are rebels. They're innovators. They're creative change makers. They come up with these brilliant solutions to things that we might have been stuck on for years, months, decades, whatever it might be.

And I know that what I'm about to share with you is going to land with you because it is a really personal and vulnerable story about my own journey in really carving my own way and doing things differently and honouring Bye. Bye. Really my method and my way of doing things in the world and [00:02:00] why I'm so passionate about really empowering others to honor their process and do things differently.

And with that comes obstacles and challenges and struggles. By no means did I just one day wake up and go, Okay, I'm just going to show up as authentic as possible. I don't care what anybody says. It has been a journey and I want to share that with you because I know one of the biggest hangups that I've had in my journey is second guessing my innate knowing, second guessing what has come so easily to me, second guessing the direction that I want to go and the way in which I want to go.

And I know it's the biggest reason why many people maybe you included, don't actually go after the thing that you want and do it in the way that you want because you're comparing yourself to others out [00:03:00] there, number one. But number two is you've never seen anyone else do it. And so you're terrified that it's not going to work.

You're terrified that people aren't going to see the value in it. You're terrified that you might fail and that it might, you know, completely crumble around you, but. What I also know to be true is, is that while there is failure in the process, oftentimes, what ends up happening when we do this, when we really, truly.

Embody the message that we're speaking. We embody the work that we're doing. So much magic happens. And I want to share with you again, some of my story, because when I started this podcast nearly three years ago, this was my mission. I was at a crossroads in my business. I was questioning whether or not I wanted to stay in marketing and sales.

I did not agree with a lot of the way that marketing and sales was being taught. I had invested in coaches. I had [00:04:00] invested in coaches that have changed the trajectory of my business, even though I don't agree with them, right? They illuminated a path for me that allowed me to really carve my own way in the industry, and do it in a way that is so me, and show up on this podcast weekly and share with you from that.

really authentic place, no filter, no holding back, no script, no template, just really riffing what's on my heart and sharing from more of a lived and embodied experience. And not that I wasn't doing that before, but what I was doing before, and I shared this in my end of year newsletter, and this podcast episode today because when I sent out that newsletter, it was something so pure from my heart.

And so inspirational that I, I really wanted to share and the lessons I [00:05:00] learned, but also really the way forward for me in 2024, and I'll share that on another podcast, but the moment that I sent send on that email, I was feeling. This really weird energy going into 2024 and I think it's because number one where I live right now We don't have a lot of snow and that is so unusual for us.

So we went into Christmas for the first time I think in all of my existence or at least that I remember we had no snow for Christmas like we could see grass Granted it was dead and brown and all of that, but we could I can still see the grass in my backyard And that's really weird. So I think the energy felt off a bit and we still don't have snow.

And here we are in the new year of 2024. And so the energy sort of felt weird. The other bit of it is, is that the prior two years, I had had probably one of my busiest end of [00:06:00] years, right? October, November, December was like crazy busy in 2021. I launched a new program, highly successful, amazing launch. But what that meant was I was kick starting a brand new program, Jan 1, here we go, hit the ground running.

2022 was no different. I ended the year launching Spellbound. I'm so freaking glad I did, but I hit the ground running. And I was also ending the year with With five deadlines for copywriting, including a website, including launch copy, emails, you name it, setting up ads. It was crazy. And I ended the year in reflection going, I want my business to look and feel differently going into 2023.

And I set the intention that I wanted to have more of a sustainable foundation, but also a sustainable business going into 2024, where I wasn't launching necessarily something new, although I did launch two low ticket offers in [00:07:00] October. They were done and completed. by December, right? And they're out there and people are loving them.

But I wanted December. I wanted to enjoy December. I wanted to enjoy the holidays. I didn't want to work like a crazy person between Christmas and New Year's. And I got what I wished for. But what I think happened was the energy going into the new year wasn't something that my body was used to. I had been hustling for my entire entrepreneurship career, basically, right?

When I had the wine store, end of year, it wasn't a quiet period. We ran into Christmas, uh, skidding into Christmas, skidding into the new year, basically going like, what the heck just happened? You know, it was our busiest time of the year. And there was always things to do in the store. You transition to the online space.

I never really took a break between Christmas and new years. And so it was sort of a weird energy as well because again, I was coming into the new year with this like rock solid, sustainable foundation. I had a beautiful [00:08:00] team supporting me. I have a beautiful team supporting me and I just felt very differently in my business.

And I think that sort of shook me a bit because our brains love to rattle the cage when Our nervous system is calm when we're grounded, when things are going tickety boo, when there's nothing wrong. Our brain loves to create drama and go, hmm, something's off. You have a weird energy. Uh, you should be busier.

You should be doing more work. What if you are losing momentum? What if the tides are changing for your business? Like, these are all of the noise that comes up in my brain, and I'm sure you can resonate with this. Right? So I sent that email off and the response to the email was so reminding to me because when I'm in it.

This grounded, silent place, like I said, the noise can get loud and what I've learned to [00:09:00] realize is, is that if they're just thoughts that are coming through and I contemplate them, right? I'm like, well, what does this mean? Right? And what are you trying to tell me? Or where do I need to go from here? And part of that questioning.

comes back to the whole notion of do you really want to be in the marketing and sales space doing marketing and sales because there's still this rhetoric out there that sells these grandiose promises. I just saw one the other day, right, touting all the you know, money wins that clients are having in X periods of time.

And I'm like, are we still doing this? Are we still using this to, in my opinion, lure people in, right? And some people might argue me and go, Oh, it's a money mindset thing. Like women are allowed to celebrate. Women are allowed to make money. And that is. Absolutely 100 percent valid. We're allowed to celebrate.

We're allowed to be proud about the work that we do. We're allowed to be proud of [00:10:00] the money we make and all of that. And the achievements and the accolades and all of that. We're allowed to be proud. We're allowed to talk about it. The problem that I have is that that's not what those shares are for.

Those shares are not to celebrate. Those shares are to promote. And there's nothing transparent about them. There's no context, right? In 2021, I launched a brand new program. I had a 40k launch. I made the investment back in the high ticket program that I was in. in 30 days. I spent the next 12 months barely making ends meet because it wasn't sustainable.

What I had created was not sustainable. What I had created was not in alignment with me. What I had created was emulating and replicating What was out in the industry? It wasn't that I couldn't teach it. It wasn't that I [00:11:00] couldn't, you know, it wasn't that I was not authentic with what I was teaching. I have 20 plus years of experience in marketing and sales.

I could probably teach about anything at this point. I could teach at a university level in academia if I wanted to. And I. Literally had created something that was it was emulating the industry because I thought that's what I needed to do to be successful. I'm not going to go down that path of that story because I have shared it, but when I launched Spellbound, I was like, I'm doing it my way and the voice in my head kept.

me questioning, people aren't going to want this, this is different than what's in the industry, this isn't scalable, there's all of these things that sort of come up, right? And again, it's that comparison. And I'm sharing this with you because to me, this is the reason why so many of us don't carve our own path.

This is the reason why so many of us [00:12:00] Never really do the thing we say we want to do. We don't honor that authenticity, that grace. And we don't honour that within our business because we're scared about the failure. We're scared about people not wanting it. We're scared about people not understanding it.

We're scared about the unknown. We're scared about, well, nobody's carved this path before, and I don't see anybody doing this and. Why I'm sharing this with you is because if there is even a part of you that is questioning whether or not your way, your method, your process, your way of doing things is valid, good enough, gonna have an impact, gonna create results for people, then this is the podcast for you to understand that.

Your way and your method and the way in which you speak about it and your realness in speaking about it Is the thing that's going to draw people in? Is the thing that's going to set up [00:13:00] expectations in the in the work that you do in a way that is transparent and ethical in a way where there's this mutual understanding of what is going to happen when you do the work together, right?

But when we sell these grandiose promises, when we use FOMO, false scarcity, even urgency, you know what I mean? When, when we promise something, when we say something like, so and so lost X pounds in 30 days, one, we're creating an expectation that that's going to be the reality for every single person that does this work.

And I can tell you right now that that just is rarely the case. I've been in enough programs, I've done enough weight loss challenges. It's rarely the case. It really is rarely the case. The other thing that it does is it creates urgency in your nervous system without you even knowing it. Right? Because you have this expectation that you can create [00:14:00] results in 30, 60, 90 days.

And you go into that with that expectation. But what happens is, within 30 days, let's just say, I don't know, you go through a breakup. Maybe you're going through a divorce. Maybe there's a death in the family. Maybe there's an illness. And now, oh shit, the 30 days has come and gone and you're nowhere near that 90 day promise.

And then you start to panic because you're like, Oh shit, now I'm running out of time and I don't have enough time and what's going to happen, right? You can see how that language, that rhetoric impacts the way in which we think, the way in which we act, the way in which we show up. And so, if you show up with authenticity, with realness, with rawness, in a way that's yours and you honor your process, That is going to be reflected out to your people and they're going to come in with a grounded, [00:15:00] calm, presence in the work that you do together.

They're not going to come in kind of rushing through life, so to speak. This urgent, this, oh my god, I'm running out of time. Oh my god, I need to get these results in these days, right? But, I also equally know that it's easy to look and get caught up in the hype of those results, especially if you are a heart led person, because you want your people to get results.

You want to create the impact. You are driven by the impact more than you are the money. And so if you're gonna make a promise. You want people to get those results, but then there's so much pressure on you to get these results that might not necessarily be doable. I don't want to say realistic, but I want to say doable and that is going to impact the energy that you have In your containers or [00:16:00] in your experiences or in the work that you do, I know that it has impacted me, right?

Because I still look outside and go from time to time. And I'm like, wow, you know, these coaches, their clients are like, you know, making 100 K months and, you know, 5 months or 5 days or whatever it is, these ridiculous promises. And I'm like, My clients are making massive strides in their business, but it's at a calm, grounded place.

And that's a feedback that I get. I get this feedback. That's like being in your world is calming. There's a peacefulness. There's a groundedness. That in and of itself to me is far more valuable in the work that I do because. I want to sell resiliency. I want to sell sustainability. I want people to be in it for the long haul.

I want people to create a business that isn't a one hit wonder, a one off [00:17:00] massive launch, and then I No results post that. I want people to understand that there are ebbs and flows in business and that there are ups and downs and that, you know, you can create massive success using, you know, a method and then that method no longer works and you've got to adapt and change and get innovative and creative.

But what is often taught, again, from the marketing and sales perspective, is a one size fits all, a cookie cutter approach, a step by step method. And what that creates is what I call a one track mind. It doesn't create curiosity, doesn't create innovation, it doesn't create, um, you know, people thinking outside of the box, it doesn't create that.

And so then when the one thing that they learned and invested in doesn't work anymore, then Everything goes out the window and panic sets in because you're like, Oh, my funnel isn't working or that sales tactic doesn't work anymore. [00:18:00] And there's, we're not instilling people with the creativity and the curiosity and I get wrapped up in this sometimes because sometimes I question myself.

I'm like. Am I teaching them creativity and innovation and resiliency and sustainability? Like is, do people want that, you know, is it valuable? And then there's days I contemplate whether or not, you know, I should be doing this or should be doing something different. And these, this is the, the um, juxtaposition, this is the dance that I think a lot of entrepreneurs, at least that I've talked to, have.

And I wanted to be honest and transparent and vulnerable with you about what it looks like for me in a lot of ways, and the challenges and the obstacles that I equally face. But I wanted to encourage you because I'm going to go back to the email I sent out at the end of the year in this sort of like Really vulnerable share and a ton of truth [00:19:00] bombs and the response to it I was getting people responding to me by email telling me how powerful the email was how Authentic it was how I continually remind people to lean into their process in their path to trust their Authenticity to trust what they know to be true even if The path that they're carving is so uncertain.

And those were the messages I was getting back from my emails. And this is like the most response I've received from an email that is like, not a sales email. There was no link to buy anything. There was nothing. It was just me sharing from the heart about what I really, really, really, really Want to leave with you today is that there's so much possibility available to you so much a possibility and there's so much opportunity and we can lean into it and the uncertainty of it [00:20:00] and we have the ability to impact the industries that we're in.

We have the ability to change people's perspectives and we have the ability to have an impact. And I'm seeing that. And that email showed me that I am creating an impact in the world. of Marketing and Sales. One of the women that wrote me said, you are literally doing and going against the grain from many, many, many people out there, because most people don't share in the way that I do, talk the way I do about marketing and sales and really, truly want to bring the heart back into it.

And what's crazy about this all is I'm going to tie it back to Gene Keys because when I first stumbled across the Gene Keys, my brand, uh, Gate 50 is my sun sign and it's a big part of my personality. And it is bringing the heart back into business. And I fought it, [00:21:00] right? Similar to how I fought the podcast and fought the direction I wanted to take the business and, you know, what I wanted to do in the, in the space.

And I fought it because I was like, is this, is this the path? Is this the impact? Is this the change? And then boom, this Gene Keys pops up and it's like, you're here to bring the heart back into business. And I was like, wow, okay, this is crazy. And I appreciate y'all for listening every week. I appreciate y'all for, you know, DMing me or emailing me and telling me how impactful what I do and how I share is impacting you in the way that you show up in your business, because I know how difficult this can be when We see a lot of the things out there, again, that comparison, that looking outside of ourselves.

We see people doing things a certain way that either we don't resonate with, we don't align with, or we outright just don't agree with, and it's frustrating. It can [00:22:00] be really, really frustrating, and really frustrating when you care deeply about helping people, and you care deeply about the work that you do, and you see the lack of transparency, the lack of context, the lack of authenticity in in the world that you're in and you're like, man, are we still doing this?

You know, I want to honor that. I want to bring back conscious commerce. I want people to purchase from a place of real deep groundedness and know that they're making a decision that isn't from a shadow place in them, right? Isn't from that like dysregulated emotional state that they need this thing in order to make this investment back in.

30 days, you know, when we promise that to somebody, when we tell those stories and we say so and so made their money back in, you know, 30 days of joining my program. Yes, that might be true, but it's a fraction of the truth. It's a [00:23:00] fraction of the truth. It's not the full picture because like I said, I've made my investment back in those short periods of time, but I've also then equally spent the rest of the fricking time in those experiences, barely keeping my head above water because I'm investing high ticket.

And I'm trying to live off of what I just earned plus pay team. Plus, right? There's all these other things that nobody talks about that nobody wants to talk about. We just want to paint this rosy picture, this grandiose big, you know, everything's all perfect over here. And there's so many elements to running a successful business.

There's so many elements to being and showing up as a successful business owner, but a leader, right? Being a leader in your business, showing up and leading a team, but also leading the way that you do things from a place of radical responsibility, from a place of really truly owning, not blaming everybody else around you, not blaming the world around you, which is why I couldn't walk away from the marketing and sales [00:24:00] industry, because I would have been blaming it.

What was me, right? The marketing and sales industry, I don't agree with it. Well, I'm going to freaking change it then. And that is what I want to leave you with today. If you, if there's a thing on your heart that you know deep down you want to change the way that you do things, don't let what you think is the right way to do it, specifically if you're selling The Invisible, because I hear this, right, is that Kathryn, can I really be successful selling The Invisible when what seems to work is one big tangible result, what seems to work is hyper specific, really dialed in niches, when in reality, what I'm here to do is bigger and more expansive than that.

And the truth is absolutely because the truth to me is, is that when you speak your truth and when you show up authentically, and that is the biggest shift that I've made in the last year, my business looks and feels drastically different because. I am [00:25:00] so much more embodied in the work that I'm doing and embodied in the message that I'm sharing and you can hear if you go back and listen to the beginning of this podcast again, not from a non truthful place, everything I shared, you know, two years ago is truthful to me, but I was filtered right?

I was, rigid in, in how I was sharing it. It felt forced. Uh, it felt, you know, like I was just taking things off a box. I have to share this and I've got to write this and I've got to create a piece of content around this because this is the thing that's going to get somebody to buy. It was very robotic.

And what I constantly try to encourage my clients to do in Spellbound is to like, let go of that. Let go of what we know the outcome to be. Let go of that thing of like, I've got to write this in order to get someone to do this. Because when we forget about that, we're no longer filtered. We're no longer rigidly following something.

We're just speaking. We're just showing up and talking the way that I am doing here [00:26:00] today. Again, I have no script, no template. I'm not following anything. I'm literally just speaking what's coming to me in the moment. And sure, if you're just starting out, or you're maybe not as comfortable verbally speaking, you're more comfortable typing things up or whatnot, then yes, this might take a bit of honing and practice.

Absolutely. I'm not saying not to follow a strategy or anything like that. I do believe we need a strategy, but I do believe we need to lean with our, lead with our intuition and instinct first. And I do believe that through that intuition and instinct allows us to express ourself and have that artistic and creative expression, that authentic expression that is probably a little rough around the edges.

might not always have the perfect words, might stumble on your words, might make up a fricking word. I do it all the time. And then using the strategy that you that is aligned with who you are. And this this, again, is [00:27:00] a whole other ballgame. This is a whole other place, right, where you've got to get curious about that.

I've tested so many different strategies and sometimes it is trial and error. And sometimes that is the process. Sometimes we need to walk through that process to realize that wasn't the path we wanted to take or isn't for us. Which comes back to radical responsibility because we can look outside of ourselves and blame the coach or the other person, da da da, for selling to us in a way.

I do believe as sellers we have a responsibility to sell transparently and ethically and in a conscious way. I 100 percent believe that. I do not believe that is only on the buyer. I believe the seller, we have responsibility, but I am also a buyer in a lot of places and it also is my responsibility to be discerning and to question and to sit and process and go, is this really the path I want to take?

Sometimes, yes, we can make impulsive decisions and [00:28:00] all of that, but again, it's learning from those and it's learning from it and not beating ourselves up about it. Because I've made investments that, to me, I learned a lot about myself and that, to me, is worth the investment. So maybe I didn't come out of that investment or that experience or that period of my life the way I expected it to be.

That's okay, because I still learned about it, but that doesn't mean that along that journey where I'm looking to sort of continue to find myself and hone my skill and have that mastery and be more and more embodied in the work that I do, that I don't have these, you know, comparison things that come up or where I doubt myself or doubt the approach, specifically when the path is unknown and you're carving your own path and you are going against the grain and That, to me, you know, I recorded that podcast about, you know, what to expect in 2024 and [00:29:00] beyond, but the more we can lean into that, and the more we can really look at innovative ways to do things, the more we uncover what our edge is, right?

That elevated edge. I wrote a whole quiz about it. If you haven't taken that quiz, it's free. It's amazing. I don't talk about it enough, but it's really understanding what our edge is and not from a place of like, what do I need to pick in order for my audience to, you know, For me to stand out, it's like, what do you want your edge to be?

I knew I wanted my edge to be really bringing the heart back into business and marketing and sales specifically. I knew I wanted my edge to be, I don't want to do marketing the way everybody tells me to. I knew I wanted my edge to be, I'm going to change the way we do marketing and sales predominantly in the online coaching space.

Predominantly in the online coaching space, because. To me, it's amplified there for whatever reason. It's a weird [00:30:00] environment. Sometimes it's very amplified. You don't see it in, you know, in other industries. You don't see it with, you know, massage therapists or yoga instructors where they're like, Oh, by the way, I made X amount of dollars.

And, Oh, by the way, my clients are da, da, da, da. Like we don't see that, right? We don't see that, that. You know, selling the result, this grandiose result to get people, and you see it in the weight loss industry a lot. You see it a lot in the online coaching space, and perhaps there's the overlap happening.

Maybe we, maybe there's a lot of people that transitioned into the coaching world and came from the fitness space. I don't know, or we looked at that and saw, you know, that it worked. Because again, like I said, it does work. But just because it works, just because it works, Doesn't mean it's ethical, doesn't mean it's transparent, doesn't mean it's the way forward, right?

And the only way we're gonna change the way we do things in whatever [00:31:00] industry you're in is finding the courage to challenge those. Finding the courage to go against the grain, finding the courage to tune out the noise, finding the courage to go, I know my way is not commonplace, or people aren't doing it, or I haven't really seen a lot of people doing it, but I'm gonna do it anyways.

I'm gonna trust. That, that inner knowing, that instinct, that thing that's guiding me, my values, my beliefs, I'm going to trust that over what I'm being sold or what I'm being told is the way forward. So, with that, I really hope this episode has helped you. Find the courage, the empowerment, the inspiration to really go after what you want in 2024, to stop making an excuse about why you can't do it or why it's not working, and to really find a way to create it, to find the courage to create what it is that you want, because [00:32:00] what you want, what's on your heart, what's been placed on your heart, the thing that you are being called to do, um, is needed, is wanted.

And I'll leave you with one thing because that's what one of my clients recently said to me, you know, I'm just really happy that you've reflected back to me belief in my idea, belief in what I want to do. And that is the first hurdle, right, is believing that what we want and believing that the way in which we do things is the process for us.

That same client I asked, you know, what's your process? And she shared it with me and I was like, amazing. She's like, but it's not. Like, there's not really this, like, structured framework, and so that's okay. My process is very intuitive. Show up to a call, and I can intuitively guide people through. Granted, I have a lot of, you know, experience in marketing and sales as well, accompanied with the intuition, but again, I'm leading with intuition and instinct.

I'm leading with that. Authenticity and that creative expression. And then I'm using the strategy and the knowledge [00:33:00] and the years of mastery to help all of that, which is a combination that is unique to me in a lot of ways, right? And you have the same, you have the same experience to some degree. You don't need to have 20 years of experience.

So you can have five years, you could have six years, you could have four years, you could have two. It doesn't matter years of experience. That doesn't make. anybody better or less than or whatever. It's just the unique combination of what you do is what people are going to be attracted to. So with that, no more excuses.

Go out and create what you want to create and find the courage to go against the grain, even if the path, and more times than not, the path is not going to be paved out for you, right? You're going to be the one paving it. If you're a change maker, a thought leader, an innovator. You've got to carve your own path.

You've got to lay the stones. No one else is gonna show you how to do that. So with that, I hope you have a fab day. Cheers! Thanks for listening. [00:34:00] We'll see you right back here next time. You can also find us on social media at Creatively Owned and online at creativelyowned. com. Until next time, keep showing up as your authentic self.